


A Study in Red & Black

by wherestheangel



Category: Supernatural
Genre: First Kiss, Fix-It, Hurt Castiel, M/M, Mark of Cain, MarkofCain!Dean, POV Dean Winchester, and cas needs some prompting to speak about his feelings, basically i just feel like making myself sad????, dean is too tired to not, dean just seriously needs some hope so here you go babe, it actually turned p happy by the end so theres that, minor fluff at the end, pre slash, some blood talk but v brief, srsly i suck at tags so bye, study in color
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-31
Updated: 2015-08-31
Packaged: 2018-04-18 06:42:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4696004
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wherestheangel/pseuds/wherestheangel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Basically this has been in my head for months and I feel the need to share my pain. I apologize now, but it does say fix it so there's that???</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Study in Red & Black

Dean feels the Mark throb with anger. It is at once his and not his, foreign but familiar. And as it spreads through his body as thoroughly and insidiously as a cancer, his vision turns a mottled red, blackening around the edges.

It creeps into every sense until he tastes red and hears it, feels it until it drowns every other thing out. He doesn't know where he is or who he's with, the Mark and it's fiery hatred are his only true companions.

It fills him to the brim, and Dean unleashes every ounce of it.

Swirling combinations of red and black surge through him and at this point he welcomes them. _I am them_ , he thinks to himself. The Mark purrs in agreement.

 _But wait._ Even this far gone in the heady rush of power that the darkness brings him, a small part of him knows that something is wrong. _There was someone I was with_....

Again, the Mark pulses and as much as it brings him pain, it also intoxicates him. Every sense is on fire as the red reaches him anew, followed by the blackness, always the blackness second. He loses himself in it, forgetting any misgivings he may have held.

That is, until he hears two words from below him.

"Dean, please."

He knows that voice. It doesn't sound right to his ears, that voice shouldnt sound so garbled and... hurt.

The Mark is screaming for his attention, flooding his system with hatred and anger. It doesn't stop him.

The voice has caught his attention now, and as he focuses on where it had come from, his perspective changes. The red slowly becomes blood, far too much of it. The black twists into dark, unruly hair that is partially matted down.

And suddenly, blue fills Dean's vision as he looks into Cas's eyes. He finds defeat in them and feels sick.

Before he is able to say anything, the glint of silver catches Dean's eye. He turns toward it, and is horrified to find Cas's blade in his hand, poised to strike.

He drops it without thinking, cringing when Cas flinches.

But then Cas is looking at him with such hope that Dean almost reaches for him despite himself. He doesn't deserve to touch Cas, especially after this.

 _Christ, I could have killed him. I need to leave, need to get out of here_.

He moves to get up, to get as far away from Cas as possible. Cas doesn't let him. A hand comes up to his arm and grips tightly, as if Cas is afraid he will disappear. He tries not to be bitter about how the situation is usually opposite.

"What broke it?" Cas asks, immediately driving any thoughts Dean might've had from him. His mind is flooded with memories of himself asking the same question as a hand had drifted away from his face. He remembers the answer Cas had given him, and is suddenly positive it was a lie. A lie he could easily duplicate.

After everything though, he finds he doesn't want to. He's tired of lying and hurting and breaking. Instead, he looks back up into the blue and answers truthfully,"you."

Cas looks bewildered, but not upset by his honesty. His mouth hangs open slightly, a human gesture that Dean decides he likes.

"It was the same for me, you know."

Dean nods, "I put that together."

Cas's hand is still grasping Dean, and he finds that the touch feels hot, purifying. It drives the black away until he no longer feels it. The red slowly transforms into a warm and inviting color, one that screams home, stay, even _love_. He wants more, needs more.

It doesn't even register that he's moving until his lips are on Cas. He is surprised at how _okay_ it feels, at how Cas doesn't once hesitate beneath him.

He runs a hand through Cas's hair and finds that it is soft, no longer tacky with blood. Dean pulls away then, and is pleased to see a bright smile on a clear face. And despite everything, a smile comes to his face too.

Cas clears his throat. "Dean," he starts slowly, "it's always been you. And I- we can get through this. Together, if you want."

He suddenly feels lighter than he has in years, the weight of everything that's happened lessening until he barely feels it. _Maybe we could do it_. The thought is all the prompting he needs to kiss Cas again, this time mingled with a wetness that he will wildly deny to his dying day.


End file.
